1. |
Clearing Out The Weeds
03:00
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I cleared the weeds off of her home
I tore the seams of all of your (her) clothes
I stole the seeds out of her bowl
I broke the mattress springs just like chicken bones
There was a time I walked freely in the night
And I kissed you in alleys and bars
Yeah I felt every sting of desire
But it’s gone.
I killed the bees with the rusty garden hose
Fell to my knees like I was before a throne
I can’t see anything
Inside the box you left with Touya’s things
Just some of your hair, and pieces of string
tied to a shard of glass
But I’ll take it with me
Yeah I take it
There was a time I walked freely in the night
And I kissed you in alleys and bars
Yeah I felt every sting of desire
But it’s gone.
I suck down a drink and sink into that hole
I wait for the dream to hit me like a stone
Where I sprout wings and hover all alone
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2. |
Her Sister Touya
02:53
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Well I’m standing here again
But it’s not the same as it was back when your father was in the pen
Its empty now
And the hives have all been knocked loose from where they’d been
Yeah they’ve fallen down
We’d watch her from the roof
Watch Touya scream and dance around on her small muscular feet
Till she’d fall down
“Her sister, Touya, lived behind the apartment building down the street
She sat there fat and naked all tangled up in weeds
But she seemed happy on her dirty mattress swatting at the bees.”
“I’m not a stranger” I said.
Touya did a little spin
Rat shit rides the wind on black plastic bags
And I’m looking down
Where I put my fingers in your mouth while Touya waved her legs like flags
I’m hunted now
Yeah like a rabid dog but I’m not afraid. I am afraid.
Oh Touya I see you smiling in your filth
And I see your sister She’s telling me she’s not afraid yeah she is afraid
I’m a stranger
I’m a stranger
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3. |
An Ill Son
04:08
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The night when I first saw you
Your skull made all the skin on your face shine
Skin pulled so tight
Dancing with dark eyes
Like holes as black as coal
As bright as night flickering out
I have become an ill son
Your love chewed right through the rope and chicken wire
Like a pulsing fire
When they see me now they see it too
Your cheekbones push glowing domes out of my chest
Translucent and red
I can’t sleep
I’m hurting
The night I saw you dancing
Your snakes went wild when I was told they’d be asleep
Hanging down to your feet
I knew that you’d be my red glow
My sickness grown out of the night flickering out
I can’t sleep
I’m hurting
Back then. Fresh tattoo on your wrist
When you told me that–
Your father feeds you feathers
While your mother feels the weather in her bones
It’s not the wind that moans
It’s deep within the forest
And the leaves that fall before us will be consumed
They know the rules
I can’t sleep
I’m burning
Ash falls out of my mouth
And you’re not here
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4. |
Black
02:56
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Can’t hide from Orion
He’s bright and mad and I’m too drunk to walk straight
I’ll just end up like his lion
Roaring weak while he beats stars into my mane
Until all I see is black
I flipped a coin in the kitchen
She started crying when she saw it was tails
She said “I guess it means that I’m moving”
Bones rolled through the bird on her wrist like wind through a veil
You better not look
back
Cause all you’ll see
Is black
“Where do you think you’ll be going?”
I mumbled quietly through my chipped front teeth
But I don’t think she could hear me
For the screech of passing trains and all the sobbing
She dropped her hands from her face
I saw her bird fall how light bends
Then I thought of Orion
And if he could fall how her bird did then
Would he bleed out like prisms
All cut up and colorful
A constellation with a crack in his skull
A constellation with a crack in his skull
She said
Better not sleep
Like that cause all you’ll see
Is black
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5. |
Like Waves
02:39
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6. |
I Don't Mind
02:04
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There’s a light I used to see
From the porch of my old house
Now I’ve heard it’s fallen down, but
I don’t mind
I don’t mind
In the backyard there is a shed that
Holds the bones of an animal I loved
All rearranged by the flood, but
I don’t mind, and
I decided
To buy the place for the smell
Cause some part of you is tied to it
Can’t remember what it is
I don’t mind
I don’t mind
There’s a face that I recall
When sleep loosens its grip
But, I can never look at it
I don’t mind
I don’t mind
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7. |
Filled Up With Night
02:51
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I keep pacing around my room
But it doesn’t help
and I grind my teeth
and I tear my shirt
and I grind and I tear
And I, had that dream again
Where we stood in the park frowning in the light
Then the sun went black
and the sky turned into night
The stars cut us up like butcher knives
Outside my window. Those birds chirp like camera shutters.
The kind with the feathers your dad would collect. Their gray shit drowns the all statues around here. I forgot what they’re called. But you know I walked by the place today where I broke my fist on the bathroom wall and you threw up into the sink. On the corner of some avenue and some street. I don’t know. I don’t know.
I keep writhing around in my bed
But it doesn’t help
and I bite my lip
and I crack my knuckles
and I bite and I crack
And I, had that dream again
We we’re fucking in the back seat of your car
Then the sun blew out
And the sky filled up with night
The stars fell like hail and crushed our spines
When I was falling asleep. I heard the voice of a girl.
I couldn’t quite tell who she was over the sound of all the buzzing.
But she said my name and she brushed my hair with her sturdy fingers.
Bees stung my neck and they felt like lips . She kissed my neck and it felt like bees. Felt like her name started with a T. I don’t know. I don’t know.
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8. |
It's Nothing
03:13
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I sleep through the violence of the city
But there’s a fly caught buzzing ‘round my room
And then I drink in the violence and its stench
While I hide in bars from the moon
I don’t know
I don’t know
We were hollow and heavy
Falling lightly through a dream
Then you saw something moving
I said its nothing
Through the violence of the street
I walk around remembering in fits
There was a time, while you murmured nonsense in your sleep,
that I watched a fly land on your lower lip
I clenched my fist, but I could not swing at it
I don’t know
I don’t know
Take another pull with my head thrown back
And everything is chopped up and fluid like waves
Now, slowed down, all images become beautiful
Rat tails twitch like dancing things.
Even Orion seems alright, wavering on the wet trash outside.
Wings sprout out of my lower back and I hover, buzzing, above the bar.
I look down to where you would be sitting.
Tear-streaked cheekbones.
And I see you as an old black shed.
We were hollow and heavy
Falling lightly through a dream
Then you saw something moving
I said its nothing
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9. |
All The Ugly Things
02:05
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Well I came here from a place
With lots of trees and beauty for beauty’s sake
Now, metal screeches through the night
And I’m finding that I like the way it sings
I crush rats with my heel
And smile when they squeal slow like bending steel
Hear you whistle so I run
Find you bathing in the sun
I squint in it with you.
Till you–
Say something
Back home there was a flood
And I’m told my house was buried in mud
I’m drunk and dizzy here
Where all the ugly things are lit up so pretty
But Sometimes I’d like to see a girl
With flowers braided in her hair
I pass out on the train
Till you–
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10. |
I Can't Recall
01:08
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11. |
In Bars
01:48
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12. |
As Her
02:18
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I dreamed that I was her dreaming
Woke up as her and tore my shirt
Woke up as her and said my name
I dreamed that I was her dreaming
Woke up as her and bit my lip
I dreamed that I was her dreaming
Woke up as her and my licked my skin
Woke up as her and tore my skirt
Woke up as her and scratched my legs
Woke up as her and smelled my hair
Woke up as her and said my name
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