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Feelin’ Like a Funeral

from Love on My Mind by Bambara

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lyrics

Got jumped as I stumbled home Sunday night.
He cut deep but the drugs killed the feeling.
You found me snoring on the sheets stained red.
Then you packed my wound full of ground cayenne
And dragged me out of bed.

The worn out doctor smelled like liquor sweat.
And when you saw that her stitch-hand was shaking,
You framed a shot with your thrift store lens.
I saw a flash and watched the needle dig.

(I’m feelin’ like a funeral)
I said,
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
“It ain’t the city air.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It’s deep in my soul.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It lives in there.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
And I can’t I can’t get
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
No kind of stiches there.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
So, the next time
Around, don’t go
Sounding the siren.”

We left the hospital.

On the street, we passed by the old folks home.
Another room had been moved to the trash pile.
And we watched a gown flutter like a ghost
On a dresser drawer full of taped game shows.

(I’m feelin’ like a funeral)
“I swear,
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It ain’t the city air.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It’s deep in my soul.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It lives in there.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
And I can’t, I can’t get
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
No kinda stitches there.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
So, the next time
Around, don’t go
Sounding the siren.”

At home, you put on the nightgown
And I ran my finger over moth holes I found,
Tracing constellations in a warm cotton sky.
You touched my wrist in a patch of light, and said,
“When you’re asleep, sometimes I check your pulse.”
And I said, “There’s no need cause, baby, everyday I’m feeling like a funeral.”

I’m feelin’ like a funeral
I swear,
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
“It ain’t the city air.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It’s deep in my soul, baby.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
It lives in there.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
And I can’t I can’t get
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
No kind of stiches there.
(Feelin’ like a funeral)
So, the next time
Around, don’t go
Sounding the siren.”

credits

from Love on My Mind, released February 25, 2022

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